This one might be harder on Jenn than me. Mom’s eyes were looking … through me? At me, but not. She reached out for something in the room when we were alone. I think her mom? Ditty? She’s out there, and it’s beautiful. Dementia and dying has given her peace somehow. It’s as if she has less to be upset about or be bothered by.
I stumbled on this vid the other day, somewhere, and had to show it to Jenn. Her mom died traumatically. This is different.
Jenn wrote a post:
My mother in law has never been big on birthdays. She will tell you this herself. She often forgot her own sons birthday, and loved feeding her horses rather than buying gifts.
I have always loved celebrating my birthday. So, when she came into my life, she learned that my birthday was special. Over the last few decades, she worked hard to remember my birthday every year. She was always within a day or two of it and sometimes right on time. Now, she never did this for anyone else, not even her precious baby boy who I’m married to. In fact, I often had to call and remind her it was his birthday the next day when his time to celebrate came along. But for some reason, she made it a point to try and remember mine long before dementia set in. 33 years or so now.
This was one of the last birthday greetings I got from her last year, I believe. A hand written card that meant to say ‘yours is the only birthday I remember, but dementia stepped in and got her words mixed up. Also, I have always called her mother in law and I love how she signed her letter. It has been on our fridge since the day I received it. I imagine I will miss this more than anything when she’s gone. The small interactions that bring us so much love, joy, and importance. I love you Mother in Law…
She whispered ‘You’re my baby boy’. Through her dementia, she has always said this to him. She lights up when she sees him and I love the way she stares at him. He is such a gentle soul, I hope he feels the overwhelming love of his mother in the days that come and is comforted by the love of the God that brought us all together.
Mitty Memories – Mittymems.com – was put up sometime in 2025.